There are no superwomen and supermen.

Tanja Vainio is the Swiss head of an international electrical engineering conglomerate. Significant societal themes such as digitalization, energy transition, climate neutrality, sustainability and also gender equality are part of her everyday professional life. For her, as a mother of three children, it is crucial that progress in this area is also personally relevant to advance and shape these issues. A conversation about change, modern families and lived gender equality.

Tanja, what is your perspective on the change concerning gender equality?

In my view, gender equality has many dimensions. The equality between men and women is one of them. But it is crucial if we want to be a fair and progressive society. Switzerland has made a lot of progress recently in eliminating the still existing discrepancy in gender equality: in politics, in the job market and in the educational system. But there are still challenges, particularly regarding role distribution, professional advancement opportunities and affordable childcare. I deliberately say “affordable” because there are now a lot of offerings in urban areas. But for many families, it is still too expensive.

How do we change that?

We are all called upon to act: politics, businesses and society. Many companies are keeping up with the times and offer families some benefits that make balancing work and family life easier so that both parents can work if they want to. But the awareness of gender-specific stereotypes needs to change much more significantly. We need strong role models who lead the way and show that you can be and do whatever you want. Each of us can also reflect on our own behavior and question ourselves. Am I a good example as an employee, supervisor or friend? That also brings about a change in mindset. I am convinced that a society with gender equality also promotes economic progress.

You grew up in Finland. What was the understanding of gender equality in your home?

Both of my parents were employed. My mother even had a better position than my father. That definitely defined my understanding of gender equality, independence, personal commitment and readiness to work. In all families I knew, both parents worked. Not just my family, the entire environment shaped and inspired me to be brave and set ambitious goals for myself. I learned early on that everyone should pursue their professional goals – regardless of gender.

What has been your experience in balancing family and career?

It’s always a challenge for mothers, but a beautiful one. I think every mother has moments when she wonders if she can manage everything, especially at times when you are very challenged professionally or the children might be going through a difficult phase at school. Flexibility and organization help. It is important to acknowledge that you can have everything, but not all at the same time. No one expects that from you. When the children were small, I consciously chose a job that required me to travel less. There are phases when you must set priorities. For me, at that moment, it was the family. You should not decide that alone but involve your partner and also the employer. I have always experienced a lot of support and flexibility from my employer. At the end of the day, none of us is a superhuman. I am not a superwoman, and I suspect there are no supermen. People who support you are irreplaceable. As a mother, you need people you can rely on. Our parents, for example, do not live nearby. But, if we ask them, they come immediately to support us.

Is it easy to ask for help?

No. The advice is always easy to give to others: just ask if someone can help you. But it was never easy for me. I think it’s not easy for many women. When my children were small, I should have done that much more – just to ask for support.

Were there particular situations where you would ask for help in retrospect?

There are always stressful phases in the job: a new job or an important project, for example. For us as parents, the first six months after a move were always very demanding. We moved frequently due to our jobs. Then you have to set up everything anew: a new school, new doctor, new friends. We always took great care that our three children settled in well and found friends. But one must not forget: we parents also need friends. When you work, you have to get used to the fact that there will always be appointments at school or childcare that you cannot attend because you are in the office or have other professional commitments. I have always received support from my husband at all times. Parenting is a joint matter for us. If I couldn’t, he would go and vice versa.

Aside from that, do you have a division of tasks at home?

Since our third child, my husband has been a “Full-time dad.” He is at home for our children and takes on many tasks and our entire organization. Since the children’s grandparents live far away, this is a super solution for us. We decided on this when our youngest was one year old, and we moved to Hungary for work. At that time, there was a lot on our plate. It was not manageable with two working parents.

Was it challenging for him to put his career aside?

To do that, you need a great understanding of your partner and healthy self-confidence. Of course, people ask him curious questions: you don’t work? When will you go back to your job? You have to be very stable in your self-confidence. For us, it was always clear: if one stays at home, then it’s my husband. But we discussed it together, talked it over and weighed it up. Just because you agree in theory doesn’t mean it works in practice. Recognition and appreciation are very important. It’s not just about recognizing my career but also about appreciating what he does for our family. Gender equality also means recognition for both roles.

What obstacles do you see today for women who want to balance family and career?

From my perspective, we need even more childcare options. I also mean day schools. Small children can already be looked after all day, but as soon as they are older, it becomes more difficult again. In addition, there are still traditional role models: the woman stays with the children, the man works. If the mother goes back to her job, there are resentments in the environment against this decision. But a lot has already changed. If mothers work, they often have financial disadvantages due to high childcare costs. That should not be the case. And finally, there are often still inflexible working conditions. When the children are small, you just have to reschedule sometimes and work from home or take one day longer and the other shorter.

Do you have any tips for young women facing the challenge of balancing family and career?

Quite simply: go for it. Be persistent. Don’t let headwinds irritate you. Set clear goals. That helps to know and apply your priorities. I believe that’s difficult for women. Men formulate their goals very simply. I want to be CEO. I want to be president. Women should trust themselves much more. And role models help. When you see that someone has made it, you know it’s doable. Think about yourself. With women, work, family, friends often come first, and at the very end themselves. But you also have to take care of yourself to find your own balance. For me personally, it has always been important to have a network of other working mothers. You can talk about many things, you get support. And you learn from the stories of other working mothers that they also cook with water and you are not alone. None of us is perfect. We all make mistakes and learn from them. Allow yourself to not want to be perfect.

We talked a lot about gender equality. Why do you think so many care offerings in Switzerland are led by women or carried out by women?

I think it shows the commitment and solidarity of women. They advocate for the needs of other women and families. Women use their skills and knowledge to create the social structures that help families combine their careers and family life. They help men and women, thus creating equal opportunities for all. The work done in care centers deserves extreme recognition. And one must be aware, here it’s not women standing up for women, but women for families. They make an important contribution to society.

“You learn from the stories of other working mothers that they too are just cooking with water and you are not alone. None of us is perfect. We all make mistakes and learn from them. Allow yourself to be imperfect.”